Writer's Block: See you on the other side
Its me!!!
codelyokodiva57
If you could find out what happens after you die, would you want to know?



yes, I would like to know. If I may have children at that time or not. Or if Im married I would love to see how my family and friends would end up. I hate the idea of myself one day leaving them and they may be left untaken cared of. Especially when I know they mean so much to me I would hate to see them in ruin.

The last four months of my sixteen yr old life!!!
Its me!!!
codelyokodiva57
January was filled with so much hopes. It was still kind snowing but i was okay with it cause i had gotten mushroom boots that were really warm so if i wanted to wear a skirt with tights I threw those on wanted so bad to go to the Chinese New Yr festival but the weekend I was so tired so I did what any lazy 16 yr old would do sleep. I then was still somewhat dating kiethand had realise how broad the distance between us was becoming and I couln't take it anymore so i suggested we brak up and he suggested we be friends with benefits. i went into febuary hiding my feelings and pain cause sammi finally started dating lawrence and they were too happy so i didn't want to spoil it for them,. Though sometimes I did feel like gagging and thoughts of kieth still loomed.

February I went in to it hoping to open my heart and i tried my best to do so.Go caught in a lie fest mixed with wierd cookies between long black haired N and F. F thought lng blk N was going to go out with him when everryone knew all she really wanted t do was use him.So i told a friend who knew before i did, she outes lng blk haired N and F doesn't talk to her a few days later their flirting again and lng blk N manipulation continues even when she tried to blame it all one me. When a good certain amount of people knew what her plans were and decided not to say anything making her look trashy. And much as i loved her realised i can't be friends like we used to told her i'd always suppport her but even now were not like we use to be. I was giving too much to the friend ship and she was just taking... The cookies tried to bake for valentines day came out creepier than the month. We put them a good natural cookie distance away from each other on the baking pan yet they seem to like converting into a huge blob... the were living sugar cookies!!! i'm not lying there is proof that will soon be shown. I wnated to give them to my friends tell N what i did but back fired gave those who i love chocolate and pressed on ward to march!!! Though i really wanted to be with Kieth all those days even after our awkward break up.

March Stress stress stress report cards, finals, quizzes, quests, everythingh and everything was against me. i made sure to turna all my work in and got the most humiliating report card ever ranted about it to a few friends and a new one K she came back to the school and still couldn't believe it!!! Decided gonna man up and show what major skills i got by bring my grade up to it's best this marking period by showing all those teachers I can take any hit they can throw. set my goals and now are racing torward them and I hope and pray my report card is alot better. My mom said i may hav e had a bad month even though i was burning calories to get everything done but I realise can't fight something that's hanging on your transcript so all i can do now is show them how devoted i am. Red haired N dyed it blk and is back w/ baby daddy im worried he may be a jerk but her parent have their guards up too so i kno she'll be okay

April a spring of wild emotions, good rainy days, and a throwing a fit day after hearing mickey was coming to visit. Pissed me off so i told my mom how i feel that she really needs to move on from him and she seemed a bit annoyed but atleast i was honest and i felt a lot better.took a day of from ballet b/c it was too much and needed a break so I go tomorrow!! I saw sucker puch with sammi and lawrence it was really good to sit on my ass and just watch amovie which i haven't done in ages. Ohh and I have tap shoes!!! yay!! Days before my birthday I wasn't looking for the best party or the best ckae but my mom did her best and i'm grateful to be here b/c of her. So i got a butter cream cake, fruits, and italian gelato so happy everything the cake, mudpies, it all was great!!! And i'm so happy all the people I love were there and congradulated me becuase i realise how much they cared for me and how much I love them. I am more closer to twenty than ten and it makes me nervous to see time go by but i kno it really will be okay. And I realised how much they support me and im so grateful no matter how far we are apart!!!

HI It's myBirthday !!!!!!
Its me!!!
codelyokodiva57
After long awaited since twenty ten started it's been crazy and it's finally here!!!!!!
and now it's gone too but it still has been the best Day eve!!!!! So here we go!!!
I woke up at six ignore y alarm clock woke up at 6:30 took a shower, brushed my teeth, washed my face, lotion every where( i have a dry skin phobia) Go dressed and loaned my sister my ipod though i really didn't want to, i mean it's my birthday... was given lots of congradulations from my brothers, my mother, and sisters for my b-day was unable to leave at 7:15 it's a goal that's still in progress....&:30 just always seems to be the keeper. My family gave me taquitos as breakfast, really good but i dont eat breakfast so it was strange.OOoooo!!! But no i left later than that 7:45. i really didn't want to be late for school so i took the train, taking a twenty minute bus ride was not my plan, ma had given me 3 bucks train and junk food money, had 45 cents on my metro so i refilled it!!! ha recycling and swipe and I went to my favorite spot on the platform all the way at the end, or else i'd have to walk three blocks to get to school form 137th to 135 and St.nicolas
Walked up a flight of stairs,but before i got on I got two newspapers form the guy when i told him it was my birthday, then when exiting the train i was given one more. i didn't want to be mean...so i took it. Crossed the street still feeling ANTSY didn't really expect my day to be all that great. But when I got to the schoolI was unable to get there before eight I was 10 mins late. Didn't see keith though i really wantesd to because i wanted to see if he wouldgo back out with me because I really miss hima dn not ina boyfriend way just a really close friend way who's a dude. But also in a bf way to he was really kind to me and i enjoyed the personal time we had. he was really sweet and sometimes he'd show off but it was only to please me even when i saw it unneccessary. Went into U.S. history and saw a few of my classmates at first a few to siad happy birthday class went on as usual more came in and said happy birthday. Though in class you have to be really quiet. Mrs.Weuker's testy. in chemistry we did a lab of catalysts and how they increaase the energy of reactions then when i got up to get a paper everyone sang happy birthday that's usual in Mr.millers class. it's a tradition. Then in economics i had left my mudpies in my locker and hid them so no one would see them till lunch. We learned about market clearing price and alot more of my class mates told me happy birthday. I went to Sat prep the teacher hasn't been there lately since monday we believe we may be getting a new one. Though she makes sure to give us work and leave s us with a substitute we did the vocab words we had learned 5 a day this week from the SAt prep. Kelsey decidedif we weren't going to do work she was going to teach us greek and it was kinda fun. i learned a few but didn't write them down i wish i did. It was fun evryone then sang happy birthday again with Inari(shaniqua) leading them this made me blush because i didn't really realise how much they cared. The sung it not one but twice so it touchhed me. I then tleft and went to go get the mudpies and borught them to lunch. i gave one to Noheli, Jaridith, Eileen, and Jesus. They really liked them and Christian but he didn't want his so i decided to save it for Alberto. We ate lunch and played crazy eights and ate the mudpies. Then a friend who's a sophmore called Jay Pimental decided to take me outside where Jaridith organised a bunch freshmen friends illusion, kelvin,Millie, Jamie, James,Alberto, and they did a happy birthday song and cheered for me and honestly it was the best. i made me really smile
so i was glad cause it was turning out to be a peaceful day. Then I went to english and we meet some students from Columbia who we got to ask questions on the college life, sats, and reccomendation letters and how we can do well on them there was awebsite they gave us fatsweb.com for alot of scholarships and told us don't worry abount of people who apply just try your best, send it in and you could get one. Then in Geometry we had an aquity test I only got half of it done. i told ms.samn i'd do the rest and forgot to go see her to finish b/c i was finishing mrs. weukers two projects the Japan essay,and the chase bank capital one comparison table on who would give you more advantages. For that i eneded up skipping gym and finishin it in the library and gave them to Mrs. weuker. Then i went to go home say some friends and they told me happy final birthdays and I was gonna walk illusion home but we went to duane reade and i saw brian and paris and then we saw yennifer she went with yennifer i caught up with brian and paris and walked them to the 2 and 3 train then walked up 135st and then took the bus home and fell asleep.

OMG!!!!!!!! There so much i wanna write and what i wanna Say!!!!!
Its me!!!
codelyokodiva57
Okay twenty ten here we go overall!!!!!!
If were talking one of the most stressful years of my life here were go !!!
N and N are no longer friends anymore a relationship issue came up be between one n's brother and n over flirting and it blew up and so their not friends though i can tell they miss each other.
One n ended up in risky behavior yes sex without condoms....shamefull no matter how good it feels their relationship didn't last as i predicted...
other n decided to no longer date and broke up with her boyfriends plural yes plural... 5 boys all involved you'd think the attention would be enough ...hmmm
Me dating... sorta well kind of... i like him alot but I seem to be the only one making decisions in this relationship so i've cut off my feeling since before christmas break but I kno I do still care for him even before then so i hope it will work out. He has family issues and school issues that seems to keepus a part like a river you walk along side of hoping to see it end but it keeps going...My library debt is 150.00 yes 150.00 though i did pay twenty bucks off so 130.00.
School my grades have gone down but since today i'm more motivated to do better and to get into a college of my choice.
My family we don't celebrate christmas, at this time were making way with what we got but its been okay.
Work I want a job!!! but when ever i go anywhere their either not hiring cutting back ontheir workers!!! it's so irritating and depressing!!!!

I've started going to therapy Ms. Donyaand she's been a real help supportive and caring and kind and she listens and laughs with me when i tells stories and helps me with family school and other drama. i've been seeing her since september and she's been a real help.
I've been in Ballet since november and we soon may have a show it's alot of hard work and you always have to stay limber so i now wear heavy boots and do 40 feet points a night hectic right and i always climb stairs without stopping to see if i can make it to the top. No on my toes flat feet so your muscles are stretched... it's now my 04/08/2011 day and i want to post another blog before this official day ends!!! AAAAAHHHHHHH your only sventeen once right?

Writer's Block: Say cheese
Its me!!!
codelyokodiva57
Do you generally like or hate when people take photos of you? Do you feel anxious when friends post pictures of you online? Is your first inclination to link to them or hide them?

I have no issue if someone takes a photo jus i dont want to look stupid in it!!! and that happens to me alot!!

Writer's Block: Say cheese
Its me!!!
codelyokodiva57
Do you generally like or hate when people take photos of you? Do you feel anxious when friends post pictures of you online? Is your first inclination to link to them or hide them?



I guess it depends on the moment sometimes I have really bad hair days coincedentally when people want photos of me or me with my friends so it creates and issue sometimes... :)

Writer's Block: Now Presenting…
Its me!!!
codelyokodiva57
If you could present any award at the MTV Movie Awards, which one would you want to present? Which celeb would you want up on stage with you?

i would want to present the funniest movie award with Daniel Tosh!!!

voo doo doll poem wrote it on quizilla first then i moved it here
Its me!!!
codelyokodiva57
Created by bittenanimehead57 on 07/05/2009
thats my quizilla user name

I'm your little voodoo doll
I just sit there on the table,
the sharp pins are beside me,
the needles ready.
The little toys are all there,
the little knifes and their rusted blades
The blunt pins who leave their marks on my skin
"You say its okay to be different I am too."
But when I say I don't want to do something.
I get ridiculed.
"Nah,I was going to watch cartoons."
Why must you be so difficult?"
I choke walking out of the room.
Feeling the pain tear at me as I walk and jump onto my bed.
You’re supposed to be supportive.
Supposed to accept my reasons and my ideas but, instead you judge me.
What a hypocrite!
You said I am different and that you accepted it.
Yeah right, why am I on the table?
With a pin in my lodged in my heart?
The hurt look on my face, from your betrayal?
You’re a liar!! You always want it your way!
So just three more years, just three more...
I'll be gone and you won't try to convince me of your way any more.
I only went along feeling you knew best.
I was wrong... it's only best for you.
Idon’t want to be held under those pins.
I'm not going to be held by them.
You say college... I say UCLA!!
A smile on my face!!!
You say it may be too far away...
That smile fades but, I don't care.

To fly will be the day
I will say I love you at that airport...
And I’ll mean it.
Because I’m glad you cared.
I am proud to beyour daughter but,
my escape from those pins won'ttake much longer.
You’re my mom andI love you so but,
Even the pain you inflict helps me grow.
Not by beatings but, just by words.
They make me stronger soI can last longer...
You'll just have to watch me grow.
Just like the voodoo doll getting stabbed at every so often.
Once may be twice.
I'm glad those hands are the ones to sew my strong seams.
They also stop my stuffing from spilling and

Are stopped by me from crushing my dreams

voo doo doll poem wrote it on quizilla first then i moved it here
Its me!!!
codelyokodiva57
I'm your little voodoo doll
I just sit there on the table,
the sharp pins are beside me,
the needles ready.
The little toys are all there,
the little knifes and their rusted blades
The blunt pins who leave their marks on my skin
"You say its okay to be different I am too."
But when I say I don't want to do something.
I get ridiculed.
"Nah,I was going to watch cartoons."
Why must you be so difficult?"
I choke walking out of the room.
Feeling the pain tear at me as I walk and jump onto my bed.
You’re supposed to be supportive.
Supposed to accept my reasons and my ideas but, instead you judge me.
What a hypocrite!
You said I am different and that you accepted it.
Yeah right, why am I on the table?
With a pin in my lodged in my heart?
The hurt look on my face, from your betrayal?
You’re a liar!! You always want it your way!
So just three more years, just three more...
I'll be gone and you won't try to convince me of your way any more.
I only went along feeling you knew best.
I was wrong... it's only best for you.
Idon’t want to be held under those pins.
I'm not going to be held by them.
You say college... I say UCLA!!
A smile on my face!!!
You say it may be too far away...
That smile fades but, I don't care.

To fly will be the day
I will say I love you at that airport...
And I’ll mean it.
Because I’m glad you cared.
I am proud to beyour daughter but,
my escape from those pins won'ttake much longer.
You’re my mom andI love you so but,
Even the pain you inflict helps me grow.
Not by beatings but, just by words.
They make me stronger so I can last longer...
You'll just have to watch me grow.
Just like the voodoo doll getting stabbed at every so often.
Once may be twice.
I'm glad those hands are the ones to sew my strong seams.
They also stop my stuffing from spilling and

Are stopped by me from crushing my dreams


Created by bittenanimehead57 on 07/05/2009
bittenanimehead is my quizilla user name

voo doo doll poem wrote it on quizilla first then i moved it here
Its me!!!
codelyokodiva57
I'm your little voodoo doll
I just sit there on the table,
the sharp pins are beside me,
the needles ready.
The little toys are all there,
the little knifes and their rusted blades
The blunt pins who leave their marks on my skin
"You say its okay to be different I am too."
But when I say I don't want to do something.
I get ridiculed.
"Nah,I was going to watch cartoons."
Why must you be so difficult?"
I choke walking out of the room.
Feeling the pain tear at me as I walk and jump onto my bed.
You’re supposed to be supportive.
Supposed to accept my reasons and my ideas but, instead you judge me.
What a hypocrite!
You said I am different and that you accepted it.
Yeah right, why am I on the table?
With a pin in my lodged in my heart?
The hurt look on my face, from your betrayal?
You’re a liar!! You always want it your way!
So just three more years, just three more...
I'll be gone and you won't try to convince me of your way any more.
I only went along feeling you knew best.
I was wrong... it's only best for you.
Idon’t want to be held under those pins.
I'm not going to be held by them.
You say college... I say UCLA!!
A smile on my face!!!
You say it may be too far away...
That smile fades but, I don't care.

To fly will be the day
I will say I love you at that airport...
And I’ll mean it.
Because I’m glad you cared.
I am proud to beyour daughter but,
my escape from those pins won'ttake much longer.
You’re my mom andI love you so but,
Even the pain you inflict helps me grow.
Not by beatings but, just by words.
They make me stronger soI can last longer...
You'll just have to watch me grow.
Just like the voodoo doll getting stabbed at every so often.
Once may be twice.
I'm glad those hands are the ones to sew my strong seams.
They also stop my stuffing from spilling and

Are stopped by me from crushing my dreams


Created by bittenanimehead57 on 07/05/2009
bittenanimehead is my quizilla user name

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